The Visiting Professor by Robert Littell

Author:Robert Littell [Littell, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: FIC031000/FIC006000
ISBN: 9780715636121
Publisher: Gerald Duckworth & Co Ltd
Published: 1993-01-01T05:00:00+00:00

Lemuel stops by the E-Z Mart on his way to the Institute, takes a quick turn around the aisles with Dwayne trailing after him, a stub of a pencil poised over his pad. He has discovered in Lemuel a natural talent for supermarket management. The visiting professor has figured out that a supermarket has a lot in common with a ship: both are perfect metaphors for the science of chaos in the sense that order is thought to be lurking behind the appearance of disorder. On more than one occasion, searching for traces of order amid the chaos of the shelves, Lemuel has alerted Dwayne to flaws in the Mart’s computer program, which tailors the inventory to meet the projected needs of the community.

“I have a sinking feeling you are low on iceberged lettuce,” Lemuel observes as they pass the vegetable counter. “Ditto for Dijon mustard, Mrs. Hammersmith’s low-calorie doughnuts, the imported French dressing, economy size Stay Free.” Lemuel stops in front of an item he has not noticed before. “Yo! Like what is a Roach Motel, Dwayne? If someone checks in what would prevent him from checking out?”

Making his way past the checkout counters, Lemuel is saluted by Shirley. She runs her fingers through her naturally wavy hair. “Z’up?” she asks.

“Nuch,” Lemuel tells her.

Shirley arches her body, pushing tiny pointed breasts into her white smock. “So I still got this soft spot for gate crashers.”

“Don’t have a cow,” Lemuel laughs.

A scrawny cashier, ringing up the purchases of a squat Oriental man at the next counter, interrupts her work to shyly ask Lemuel for an autograph.

The Oriental man, dressed in a pin-striped suit and speaking with a clipped British accent, asks the cashier, “I say, is he a celebrity?”

Shirley giggles happily. “Is he a celebrity or is he a celebrity?”

The scrawny cashier bats enormous false eyelashes. “I seen you on the tube,” she tells Lemuel with great solemnity. “I think you was fly.”

The Oriental man grimaces. “Fly?”

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